I woke up this morning & saw a spider directly over me - slightly descending on an invisible string down to my chest - what foul enemy plan was that?!? - Argh - of course I didn't jump high to the ceiling & yelled (only women in films do that) - because if I would have jumped up I would have definetly jumped right into her (is spider in English female? - in German language it is - that brings her close to the imagination of a bad witch which lures you into her evil web) -
of course I had mind enough to not jump up but quickly roll sideways out of my bed - In a situation of threatening danger, I' usually am very quick to react & my senses sharpen - I think & memorize a million of thoughts within the break of a thousands part of a second, if I'm on the edge of actual danger (usually I need an hour for only one thought - of course this thought is a very long one) - in that milli-second while she came down to me I recognized her as the not so dangerious kind of spider specimen - that kind, that usually sits for weeks, months & years in her net, weaving, knitting etc. at least waiting for her prey there (it's a nice thing if spiders don't move around) - they live on their spider net world - I live in my net of daily decisions to survive - they don't get in my way & I try to avoid to disturb them.
Well but sometimes a new youngster of a spider needs to find a new district. Hey spiders my bed is not a new realm for a new spider web, so stay off!!! -
OK - I rolled out of my bed & turned quickly around to hinder her to land on my bed - my bed is my homeland my castle - I couldn't get there in again if I knew a spider around -
So - before she touched ground I tried to get the invisible spider string on which she was descending to take her by that string to another place - far far away of my bed - but although I was cutting all the air above her with my hands - just like you do if you as magician want to show, that the magic manifestation in the air is not hanging on magical string - I did that once a while ago with a spider & succeeded in putting her away - but on this one I couldn't find a string in the air & the moment my hand was quite above her, she dropped ground - was she magical? - No - I just think that she cut off of her spider string, the moment she touched ground & then I noticed her quickly heading the direction of my cushion where usually my head lies - Get off! Get off! I thought & tried to chase her away with movings of my hands right above her - she followed the route intended for her, but then from moment to the other - she was gone - that ment - she was somewhere in my bed & I didn't know where - no-one can sleep in such a bed ever again! - I had to find her! - So I took up piece by piece all the bed blankets, sheets, bed-linnen, pillow etc. & shook them to get rid of that intruder - she wasn't there - not anywhere. The worst enemy is the enemy that is very close to you & you don't know where he hides to sting or stab you from the behind.
Should I burn my bed? - At least I detected her - she was sitting on one corner of the bed on the wooden frame - but still too close - I chased her down & she left somewhere on the floor to a further wavery silken destination to reach her fortune & her fate.
You see that I didn't wanted to kill her - I got that instinct meanwhile. Since my childhood I was arachnophobic & in that time I would have killed her at once. - I was scared by big black spiders, that run so quickly & uncontrollable around that couldn't stand them in
the my room - think about if they would run in the night about my face.
But later in life I learned more about spiders & watched them & noticed a lot of very harmless small spiders - I found out that I could live with spiders that live in their nets & stay there - in my childhood there was a little black spider in a web in the toilet in a little crack between the wall & the broom locker - while I was sitting there I sometimes saw her having some prey in her spider net, sometimes not - she was very shy - as soon as you came closer, she hid in that crack behind her net - after some time I felt some sympathy for her - she was my pal pet of the toilet (Ok I totally exaggerate (but not so much)) - but at least I didn't see her as threatening & dangerious anymore - I even fed her once or twice with a fly or ant I caught & threw it in her net (I was about 10 or 12 by then) -
Much older now I'm still scared of these big fat quick running black spiders, but these decent little ones - I don't care.
I even allowed them some kind of reservation in my rooms - there lives a spider generation with long silken legs, but a very slim body, you see only like a little dot - they are having some nets in some corners of all of my rooms & I allowed it to them - because usually they stay there - I think they catch away all of the insects I don't like here around - they are my guards, that take care of me day & night, guarding me from moscitoes, ants, moths, beetles & all of that impertinent insect guys. - So I gave these guarding spiders a Royal Allowance Letter, to stay in my kingdom of attick rooms & catch their prey in their hidden nets in the corners -
Even if I clean my room, I leave them alone - who dares to destroy a spider web that is so skillfull woven.
But that shouldn't mean, that they should attack me in the night, while I lie peaceful in my bed. -
Of course this little attacker was just another harmless little spider youth who probably wanted to ground his own empire of network on a place where those older ruling spiders stay away - But hey litlle spider youngster - ther's a reason why this older spiders stay away - because here lives the king of the realm, who can smash you with the slightest touch of his finger - so I hope you learnt your lesson.
But more seriously - my flat is not full of spiders - but a allow this very decent, polite & slim race in some rare corners of my flat in their nets - but no-where else.
So this day has started, with that small spider girl parachuting me, but late in the evening, when I visited some friends & we had a beer together - a strange big moth coming from outside (one of those who flatter clumsily around you like crazy), straightly landed in my beer (my spider guards never would have allowed that) - now I came home a one single strange little stupid fruit fly circulates continiously around my body & lands here & lands there - it's still so hot here (30 degree Celsius), that I don't were a shirt even in the night to avoid sweating. This fly lands on all parts of my body, tickling me & makes me nervous, but I can't get her.
But I'm wise enough to not call my spidery body guards to get her - then they would feel free to roam here everywhere around. They shall stay in their hidden corners with their net traps layed out - & maybe this one disturbing fly will later on find a way in one of those corners - you see time is on my side & I need patience like a spider.
Anyway I didn't see this fly since the last half hour - these spiders should give me reports of their success.